I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
