It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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