White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
