I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
