So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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