I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I licked your asshole in confidence.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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