There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize