so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
