is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
