Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
