I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I have feelings that need drinking.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
