another moral hangover. fuck.
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
