We're like a lot better than the average bears
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
