New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
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