Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
kristin has been a bad kristin
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
