Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize
