Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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