i permit you to call me
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
