I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
