Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
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