Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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