Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
mondays should just be called national damage control day
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
