I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
