okay pat passed out under dana's car
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
