He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
