Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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