Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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