Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize