I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
