great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
