Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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