i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
