Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.â€
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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