I just saw a hot homeless man
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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