giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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