She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize