I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
