I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
