why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize