I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
