It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
