Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I think a kid would responsible me up
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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