Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
