OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Alive.
So much puke
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I am naked and annoyed.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
