Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
my liver is dry heaving
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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