I seem to have left my pride at pride
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
