i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
