...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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