one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
i need some magic done to my vagina
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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