so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
