i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
